Updated: May 19, 2020
I am a great believer in the beauty, potency and power of us making choices for our well-being. I have spent years learning the importance of looking after myself. But more than learning the importance, I have had to heal from the wounding that told me I 'should not' ask for what I need and want; that my primary task in life is to care for and look after others - because that's what girls/women do, whether you want to or not!
Well, f**k that! Don't get me wrong, I don't have anything against caring for others, in fact I enjoy doing so, I'm a healer after all. But only if it is my choice to do so and not at the expense of my own well-being. That would not serve me or others. I know that in order to care for others, personally or in my professional capacity, I need to set boundaries, I sometimes need to ask for help, and I need to make space and time for myself.
I know so many women who, when I ask them what choices do they make for self care and love, tell me "I don't have time for myself", "I don't need any help. I'm fine" or "I'm too busy to take time out".
In the long distant past I would have nodded and said "Yes, I know, I have no time for me either".
Nowadays I just don't buy that. They are the stories we have been told from the moment we were able to speak. They are the stories we saw modelled to us by our mothers. They are the stories we have bought into at great detriment to our mind, body, spirit well-being.
So how do we change the story? How do we let go of old patterns of behaviour which keep us trapped, shackled and depleted?
I won't pretend it doesn't take lots of hard work. Actually, yes it may be 'hard' but it's more accurate to say 'It takes courage'. Why courage? Well, because we are also taught that asking for help means we are 'weak' and if we expose our vulnerability we are 'less than'. The Truth is though that once we start doing our work, we discover that vulnerability is our courage. Allowing ourselves to connect to and be vulnerable opens our heart and allows in spaciousness to receive. And oh my goodness, an open heart and receiving from others not only feels good, it enables us to give freely and wholly because we have learnt the beauty of exchange, of interdependence, of community and of belonging.
Our transformation to becoming a Wild Women, a woman who has reclaimed her innate wisdom and therefore her deep knowing that she must care for and love herself before she is able to do so for others without meltdown, takes deep inner work. Finding an individual or individuals to support you, Circle's of women who will hold you, practices that will help you stay focused and committed to your journey are essential.
When we find the Pathway that resonates for us we unfold, untangle, peel back layers, shed worn out skins - we begin to breathe, to reconnect to our curiosity, our creativity, our passion, our Soul's song, we feel our aliveness.
Sounds pretty good doesn't it?
Let me tell you right now - you are already on your Path, you found this site, you are curious enough to explore what I (an individual) has to offer. So, take a moment to really honour yourself for making a first step toward knowing how to care and love yourself! You are awesome, you are worthy, you are deserving, you are beautiful, you are potent and you are powerful.
If this all resonates with you, I would love to chat with you and share what more I know about Pathways to Self Care and Love. Take a look at the pages on this site if you haven't already or perhaps my FB Page https://www.facebook.com/wombwisewoman/inbox/.
I look forward to meeting you online or in person.
PS How about making a choice for self care and love today, make one choice that will bring a smile to your face, put a spring in your step, shine a light in your heart?
I'd love to know what you choose.......